A man whose wife is dying told their story for the people to know. This man, who wanted to remain anonymous, married his high school sweetheart a decade ago. However, they found out this year that his wife has ovarian cancer. The couple recently moved to a new state so they could be closer to their family. The husband is struggling with how he should approach his wife and make her remaining moments happy and meaningful. He does not want his wife to see his fear, rage, guilt, and sadness.
This couple always had a good, yet imperfect sex life. This is because of their libidos mismatch which is brought by birth control and mental health drug. But over the three years that passed, their top priority was the wife’s health. For this reason, they have only been intimate for a couple of times in that span.
Moreover, both of them mourned for her inability to bear a child after the surgery is done due to her ovarian cancer. The husband knows that his wife has been lying about how she really feels. Her words were betrayed by her body. He knows that she lost all of her self confidence as the chemo treatments and other hospital procedures caused her to deal with digestive complications.
The man and wife’s sex life before her illness hit her was mostly penetrative. He has been silent about broaching sex for some time now as both of them deal with the woman’s life and death situation. Still, he wanted to make sure that he would still be able to make his wife feel as beautiful and desirable as before. They tried to find other ways that they could do to maintain their sex life even without involving penetration. However, the wife’s worsening health situation kept them from pushing the topic aside.
The Two are Now Facing A Near-death Situation
Devastatingly, the couple is now facing a near-death situation. According to the man, he would be happy to never have sex with his wife again if only it means she could live. However, the worsening situation no longer allows them to. He wants to do whatever he can for her with the remaining time they have. In addition, her comfort and happiness are his top concerns. The husband is also wondering if he should assume that sexual pleasure is the last thing on his wife’s mind. In addition to this, he is wondering if he should introduce her to new possibilities while they have some time left.
Furthermore, the husband is experiencing a lot of guilt about considering how his life would look like without his wife. The two of them have only ever been intimate with each other. The idea of dating and the culture of hookup terrifies him. Still, he knows that his wife would want him to find new love again.
He does not want his wife to leave and he does not want to be alone. In fact, one thing that he enjoys the most is when the two of them are close and cuddling in their bed. However, doing such now is kind of difficult due to some of her medical needs.
A part of the husband is yearning to find solace in the form of those realistic sex dolls. This is because he wants to at least hold someone, so their bed would not feel quite so empty. He is wondering if the idea seems crazy. However, he himself thinks that it was something literally crazy. Buying and owning a sex doll can be considered as an objectification of women. In addition, the expense he would use to buy this realistic-looking doll could be spent on other worthy causes. It is a fact that sex dolls are quite expensive. So, the money that he would use in case he pursues buying one could be instead used to prolong the life of his wife.
There is no harm if the man tries to share his sentiments or even the exact words in the letter to his wife. This is especially true because of his wife’s comfort and happiness are his main priority. In addition, the husband is probably right when he assumed that having sex with him is the last thing in his wife’s mind. Still, it would bring no harm if he asks her whether or not she is interested. However, it is important to be careful in asking as he might sound demanding. He must also be prepared to take no for an answer. If her happiness and comfort are the husband’s number one priorities, then he should be talking to her about the things that he could do to make her remaining time as pleasant as possible. If having sex is on the list of requests that she has, then good. If not, he should immediately accept it.
Moreover, it might be awkward if he would introduce his wife to a silicone sex doll that lacks any expression and emotion. The fears of the man about the idea of the dolls objectifying women are understandable. However, it is not the dolls that objectify women. Rather, it is the people who objectify women through those dolls. As long as the man is aware of the difference between animate and inanimate, then he should be good.
Sex dolls are elaborate toys. As long as they are viewed as toys, then they are not objectifying women any more than a dildo is objectifying a penis or your right hand is objectifying your choice of an orifice.
It is true that there are more important things that the man could spend his money on. However, unless he is seriously considering a poverty vow, then he probably has some things in his life that qualify as indulgences that he does not need per se. As long as he does not forget to save some money for the more important expenses, then it is fine to spend on a sex doll if he finally decides to buy one.